Spending weekends (mostly) alone can be a treat sometimes, although I miss you all. My school schedule this semester is slightly more exhausting since I am taking an extra class. If I continue at this rate, I will be done with my degree one semester early, which in dog years is like, 3.4 years or something like that.
In addition to constant schoolwork, I am also currently on a self-imposed “budget.” In my latest attempt to play grownup, I am trying to save my money so that I can someday own a home or whatever. When I announced my thrifty new budget plan, one of the actual grownups at work asked me what program I was using to help with my budgeting. This is a fair question, I suppose, since my raison d’etre at work involves meticulously accounting for changes in performance metrics (not unlike meticulous budgeting) so I suppose I have the aptitude for it. But the very idea that I would apply this sort of skill to my actual personal life was pretty laughable…truth be told, my idea of “budgeting” has thus far involved only purchasing clothing from Target or off sale racks, and frequenting the Subway $3.99 fresh value menu. I know it is a slow start, but I am feeling very thrifty and accomplished and am certain to have THOUSANDS of dollars saved in no time.
Studying for inane tests, eating off value menus, and watching 5.5 episodes of “My So-Called Life” on Saturday got me waxing nostalgic about my undergrad experience. This, on top of my lack of showering for 48 hours and re-wearing the same jeans for 3 days actually made me feel like it was 1999 again! I guess enough time has passed since college that I actually recall it with a mix of embarrassment (how could I have been so DUMB) and overwhelming affection. Saturday night, while taking a study break, I yearned for a trip to Will’s dorm room, where we would talk about the universe and its largeness and/or our smallness. And at lunchtime I wanted to call Amanda and make her go with me to ponder over why lord why we didn’t have boyfriends and eat mountains of thai noodles. Then we would feel super decadent and call Chad and make him go with us to buy second-hand treasures and collectibles to decorate our apartments. And I would force my poor roommate (and in her absence, her cat) to help me analyze in great detail every email and/or IM conversation with boys: a) I liked, b) I made out with but didn’t really like, c) I thought maybe liked me but couldn’t tell, d) who really just needed help with their thermodynamics homework, but maybe there was a subtext about loving me?
So yes, hearing Angela Chase muse over how she kept waiting for life to begin and for something to happen and for things to really kick start her life made me wistful for the time when I felt the same way…and when hanging out with friends was something I took for granted. But I guess we can’t be Angela forever. Decisions have been made, life has happened. Friends have gotten married and they’re having babies. Loved ones have been lost. Hearts have been broken and healed again. Is this what I was yearning for?
I feel so far removed from my angsty former self, but am desperately in love with her anyway.
Anywho, back to this week…I hate: stomach viruses, veggie booty for its questionable but totally possible involvement in the great stomach revolt 2007, the fact that during illness I watched a marathon of “Grease: you’re the one that I want” and now I actually sort of care about the outcome. This week I love: you (you know who you are), getting mountains of valentine cards from my favorite brown boy, Subway sandwiches, and Jordan Catalano.
1 comment:
hehe. you are adorable. i like when you wax poetic. you are good at it. ya undergrad was a funny time. best time ever ofcourse, but still how could i have let myself out of the house looking like i did sometimes? why did noone but my sister ever try to stop me? when and will we ever live in teh same city again? how could i have eaten so much, consumed so much beer and not worried about calorie intake vs calorie burning? but when i really want to feel nostalgic i reread Power Puff Journals. ha. i like how most of it is how i think rudy is mad at me bc we only hung out for 3 hrs that day instead of the usual 36 or something. haha. siigh. miss you a lot. really its a lot. xoxo.
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